Monday, November 28, 2016

The Problem with Life


"Life is 10% what happens to us 
and 100% how we react to it."
-Denis P. Kimbro

I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving, full of gratitude and grace. I had a very insightful holiday. In my family I have hosted Thanksgiving for the past eleven years, but this Thanksgiving was more exciting than past Thanksgivings.

As I prepared the Thanksgiving feast, with the chopping of celery for the stuffing, the cranberry sauce and the cornbread. I heard a rumbling sound coming from the room that is next to the kitchen, the laundry room.  I rushed to see what that was, and I slipped on a pile of water. I landed on my bottom and realize that the pipes in my kitchen had burst and that some water had managed to come out of the laundry room. The discovery was a clogged kitchen sink and a flooded laundry room, my husband had to turn of all water until he figured out the problem. This all happened Thanksgiving morning when I was roasting a turkey and everything else. After we cleaned up the mess, my husband and I decide to go to the store to get some Drano, hoping to take care of the problem. We tried to pay for the Drano, but the bank card was declined. Immediately I called the bank and was told that some checks that were deposited had bounced, and that we were on the negative close to a thousand dollars. Lucky for credit cards we could pay for the Drano.

When we got home, the smoke alarm was going nonstop! The cause was a burnt Turkey! I started to laugh so hard that my husband questioned my sanity. He was worried I had lost my marbles. This was the first time in a long time that life reminded me how spontaneous, unpredictable but exciting it could be. In the end, everything worked out just perfect. We ended up changing the tradition and going to my parents’ home instead, due to no running water. Even if the turkey was burnt it was still delicious and the ham made it just fine. It was a wonderful Thanksgiving after all.

The problem with life is that you think you are always designing it to your liking, but the truth is that life will show up and arrange certain things to it’s liking. The thing about life is to understand that it can be amazing, then awful and then amazing again. The secret to life is count to your blessing (while you have them) and the amazing things it brings. Here are three tips to adjusting to life’s curve balls, with laughter and grace.

Affirm that life is amazing.
When you show life that you are grateful for it’s amazing things, it responds by bringing more of that. Count your blessings, even when things are falling apart. As my credit card was being rejected, I was grateful for my credit cards. As, the pipes burst in the kitchen, I was happy to discover that only that part of the house needed to be fixed. As far as the burnt turkey goes, the ham went unharmed and everything was delicious.

Realize that those curve balls show your resilience.
It had been a tradition in my family to host Thanksgiving for many years. I thought I was going to flip, when things seemed to be changing. I could not handle the idea that this tradition was going to be changed. I discovered that I did not fall apart, nor did anybody else. It was also nice to take a break from washing all those dishes. Again, another blessing in disguise. Know that you are resilient and will handle anything life sends your way!

Be present and relax during the ordinary.
So many times, we are looking forward to those special moments in our lives. Christmas, New Year’s or birthdays. Yet, we forget to live, and devour ordinary moments. We don’t practice being present we keep on projecting to a future that we are never guaranteed will come. It’s ok to enjoy these next festivities that are coming, but don’t forget to inhale the mundane moments with much joy and anticipation as you do those bigger celebrations. It’s those moments that we get more of, it’s those moments that shape our lives.

In conclusion, love your life no matter what stage. Know that nothing is forever because change is the sister of life. No matter what curve balls life has in store for me, I know that will also change and I will always prevail. Believe the same for your life and it will be. Until next time Believe. Change. Become!

NancyJ

Monday, November 21, 2016

Superman Won't Save You


"Nobody can save you but yourself and you're worth saving.
 It's a war not easily won but if anything is worth winning then this is it."
-Charles Bukowski

As I plan my Thanksgiving grocery list, I find myself thinking how different it feels this year. There is a sense of uncertainty. Like many of you, I am also fearful with the direction of our country, and the direction of our world. I know that uncertainty and instability can cause chaos within ourselves. We all want to be assured that we will be ok. We all need to feel that we are going to be taken care off. Unfortunately, superman can’t save you. Only when you decided to be your own hero can you save yourself and influence others. It’s going to be up to you to change whatever situation you are dealing with to a prosperous one. Don’t expect world leaders to fix your problems. Rise above your problems, and as you do you become the shining light that will guide others to do the same. Step out of your comfort zone, be change you want to see in your home, community and your world. More than ever we need beacons of light that will bring light to the injustices of the world. More than ever we need you to step up for the scapegoats of our nation. There are no accidents in life, just life lessons. There are lessons in what is going on with the world. Lessons we may have forgotten, lessons that will remind us that our power is found in our human spirit. We have much to learn about our true purpose in this planet. Today I want to challenge you to get uncomfortable, to fight for your joy and happiness. Know that we can no longer blame others to be the cause of our misery and expect others to bring us joy and certainty. It’s YOU, and only you that has the power to transform your life and impact the life of others.  Are you willing to give up some comfort to create a better world for you and others? Here are three tips on how to be the change you want to see.

What is something you would like to change in your home, community or world?
The key to being a change agent, is to identify what you want to change. What is something that drives you insane? What do you desire? Do you wish people were kinder to each other? Are you seeking more connection? Do you wish there was no more prejudice? I believe that we all have a purpose a mission in life. We are all impacting the world with our life views and ideas. What moves you? When we identify what we would like to change we transcend in purpose. We all have a mission for our lives, there is significance in discovering what that is and pursuing that change. My mission is to inspire you to believe in your dreams, by defining all limiting beliefs. I also seek to remind you that love was the superpower given to us by our creator to change the world. Yet, many have surrendered to fear.

You can do something big or small.
To be the change you must immolate what you are seeking to change. For example, if you are seeking less prejudice in the world are you being open and inviting to people that may be different than you? If you are seeking more kindness, be the example of kindness and love. As you change your old ways you will influence others to do the same. It’s your light that will bring clarity to others. It’s easier to point fingers and blame others for problems, be the solution, be the change. It’s the little things you do that will have major ripple effects in your family, community and the world.

Your success is dependent on taking care of yourself.
You can’t change the world if you don’t change and take care of yourself. Love yourself. It’s about listening to your inner wisdom. Taking care of your body, mind and soul. When you are an advocate for yourself, you can better affect those around you. You give them the best of you and they in return give you their best. As I become aware of the love for myself I can give more to others. When you value and respect your being, it gives other permission to love and respect themselves.

Our world needs your help. It is those who have decided to be the change they want to see that have indeed changed the world. Know that you are capable of influencing others with your good deeds. It’s your mission to seek change for the better. To be successful in changing the world you must take care of yourself and reflect what you want to see in the world. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving and be grateful for all the blessings in your life. Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!


NancyJ

Monday, November 14, 2016

How My Intuition Guided Me This Morning


"There is a voice that doesn't 
use words.
Listen."

-Unknown

This morning I was ready to share with you some of the amazing things that I learned from my four day Tony Robbins seminar that I attended this weekend. Unfortunately, I was blocked from doing my blog due to many computer viruses that I discovered. So, I thought anyway! The truth was that my computer was blocked from scammers who wanted me to pay $199.00 so that they could clean out my computer. Why do I share this with you today and not what I learned from Tony Robbins? Because today once more I was reminded of my spirit voice the one that works with my intuition. Your intuition may be guided by your spirit voice or a feeling. The feeling may be excitement when you think about going back to school. In voice form it may tell you to follow your dreams. It's the one that assures you that you will be fine if you do. It may also warn you with a feeling, when something is not right.  The one that reminds you how amazing and powerful you are! I will share what I learned from Tony, in future blogs, I promise. But today let's talk about your spirit voice, your intuition. 

As I continue my passion of personal development and inspirational speaking, I am getting more comfortable with this voice. This quiet, subtle voice reminded me today, to not trust what the scammers where telling me and to contact Microsoft instead. When I did, I discovered that indeed it was a scam. They took care of the problem, and I was relieved that I listen to my voice, to my intuition. Your intuition will not only guide you in small matters such as this one, but will also guide you in deciding if you want to take grand leap of leaving your bad relationship, or the bad job. Here are three tips on how you can be guided by that powerful voice, by your intuition. When you do, you will be amazed on how your true path appears and all that negative chatter disappears.

Trust that gut.
You have heard to trust that gut feeling. Yes? Well, it’s that gut feeling I like to call your spirit voice. It’s that voice, that tells you to take another road. It also tells you to leave that bad relationship. That bad job. It’s that feeling that makes us uncomfortable with some people, but you can’t point out why. Trust that feeling, listen to that voice. It knows more that you will ever understand. It has peaked at your future and understand what is your true path. Trust that feeling and listen to the spirit voice.

Meditation results in clarity.
As I meditated this morning, I could silence my negative voice or what I call my fearful ego voice faster than other days. This made me feel more alert. When you meditate for at least ten minutes a day, you will notice that your spirit voice becomes a bit louder. Not obnoxious, and loud like your fearful ego voice, but a bit louder and clearer. If you already meditate, you understand what I mean. If you don’t it will take time and practice to do this, but if you dedicate some time you will eventually get there. There are many resources on line on how to meditate. I will work on some tips on future blogs. But for now, try to stay still for ten minutes, clear your mind and focus on nothing. See what pops up. If it’s negative, fearful thoughts it’s the ego working in your mind. If it’s loving, beautiful thoughts it’s your spirit voice your intuition. Go there!

Let the right voice guide you.
How do you know what voice is guiding you? As I already mentioned a fearful ego voice maybe louder and more obnoxious. The spirit voice may be calmer and subtle. Your reliable voice is the one is affirming, but not necessarily loud. There is a sense of calm. A feeling that you will be OK, that it has your back. On the other hand, the fearful ego voice will remind of your of your insecurities it can be cruel and demeaning. It wants to keep you a prisoner of the known it likes comfort. You have heard this voice as you decided to leave that career that no longer fulfills you. It has lied to you when it told you that you were not worthy of a new, or better relationship. What voice is governing your soul?

Being intuitive and letting your spirit voice guide you is not easy. It can be confusing because at one point you may feel that both can deal with fearful emotions, yet one guides you from bad situations by bringing emotion, such as something not feeling right. The fearful ego limits possibilities, by telling you you are not worthy of a dream or desire. It requires you to silence your mind and to love yourself. When you decide to follow your intuition, you will also discover some fun. Look at it as two different voices fighting to get your attention. One voice is loud and full of fear and the other is calm and full of love and possibilities. It is your goal uncover what is the true voice that will guide you to your destiny. Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!


Monday, November 7, 2016

How Self-Doubt Can Crush Dreams


"Self-Doubt is the anchor that keeps or ships from sailing."
-Unknown

“I don’t know if I could continue.” My new client told me as we drank coffee and talked about her past business failure. She had joined a health food networking marketing business that had a great deal of potential.  “I did not know there would be so much disappointment in pursuing your dreams. I have lost confidence that I could possibly be successful.” She said. “Failures are not the end of a dream; they are lessons you have to learn. They are kinks that you need to fix before you grow. Think about that business failure. What is something that you learned from it? What could you do differently?” I asked.  “Well, I guess I could over invite people to my presentation, so that I have a better result.” “Yes, and remember that you are just starting, it will take some time to get momentum but you will get there. For now, it’s a perfect opportunity to practice your presentation with the few people that show up.” I told her. “I had not thought about it that way. You are right this is a perfect opportunity for me to get better at my presentations. Thank you!” She said.

Who has not felt disappointed with a new career venture, following a dream or a life goal? I personally know what is like to fail my way to the top! I have been disappointed many times, but I can pick myself up very quickly. Here are four tips that will help you manage self-doubt.

“Rome wasn’t built in a day.”
As entrepreneurs, we assume that success happens overnight. Why not? We are so passionate about our service or product, so should everybody else, right? The truth is that success requires time. Give yourself time to grow. We make the mistake to believe that within a couple of months we will become successful. There is no set number of the time to reach your peak, but studies show that it could take 3-5 years, sometimes even longer. Be patient learn from your mistakes that are preparing you for that peak of the mountain.

Remember a time when you were successful.
I know it’s hard to stay positive when you have failed, but you must remember when you were successful. Know that you are capable of winning because you have won before. Write down your WINS. Ask family and friends to remind you of the times when you got the goal. We are so critical of ourselves, we focus so much on our failures that we forget about our past triumphs.

Love yourself.
 “Love Yourself,” says Louise Hay. In the past I, did not understand that this phrase is the answer to many of our problems. When we love, ourselves we treat ourselves with dignity and respect. Think about someone that you love. Your child, husband or wife? Would you mentally abuse them? Well, maybe one will abuse a husband or wife, but we shouldn’t. Be kind to yourself and others. You are more capable and worthy than you give yourself credit for.

Fail, fail and fail some more.
Remember when you fail you are on the right track. Failure is part of growth. Embrace it, learn from it and move on. As I continue to fail I am proud of my tiger stripes. They teach me things about my strength that I did not know I had. Dare to fail, dare to learn so that you may grow.

As I fail forward, I realized that in life you must experience disappointment so that you can not only learn from it, but also appreciate your successes more. It’s a win-win because it teaches you so much about yourself about, about your strength. Expect disappointment on your journey to your becoming. Expect success as well. Love yourself, and know that you are worthy of treating yourself with dignity and respect. As you do, you set the mood for others to do the same and it gives you stamina to continue to move forward even when all hope is gone. Keep your chin up beautiful and persevere! There will be a day when you will look back at your stumbles and failures and be glad you never gave up! Until next time, Believe. Change. Become.


NancyJ