Monday, June 27, 2016

It's Not What You Say!


“Genuine kindness does not have ulterior motives.”
-Zero Dean

Last week I was in a barbecue mingling with old friends who were inquiring about my business.  I told them how happy and excited I was about all the wonderful things that were happening to me.  I turned the same question to one friend, and she responded that she too, was going to pursue her passion of selling chicken eggs out on the street.  I started to laugh yet, the feeling or energy I was feeling was that she was making fun of what I do, which is to inspire individuals to identify their passion.  In trying to analyze her intention one could argue that she was just trying to be silly.  But in what I know about the power of intention, I felt that was not her purpose.   I also understand that I may have made her uncomfortable and could have had her questioning her existence.  When, I approach it in a positive light, it takes away from my feelings of being teased, to trying to understand her.  All in all, I have learned to let go and forgive people that hurt you. The truth is, it’s never about you and always about them!

Today let’s discuss how to avoid such situations with family, friends or clients.  Let’s remember that in business and life you will encounter many people that are seeking to feel valued.  To be a leader in your company or in your life you need to impact others by inspiring them to love and appreciate themselves.   I want to teach you that it’s never what you say, but always how you make others feel, or the power of intention.  Here are three tips to making sure that everyone you encounter feels appreciated and valued.

Accept where others are.
It is imperative that you understand that we all have different life experiences that makes us see the world with different eyes.  Also, it’s important that we understand that it’s OK to disagree with others, but it’s never OK to impose or make fun of someone else’s views.  We never change anybody that is not seeking change.  In my profession I have discovered that many individuals are not always ready for change even when they think they are.  So, what has worked for me is to give them time and let them seek me out when they are ready.  Learn to accept others and let go of any expectation that they should be doing things like you.

Focus on your intentions.
When you are interacting with others, understand your intentions.  Know your purpose.  Many people forget that we are energy beings.  It’s never about what you say to someone, but the energy that you are transpiring.  In my case, if I asked my friend her reasons for saying what she said, she would say to be funny.  Yet, the energy or feeling I received was that she was making fun of what I truly believe in.  Be clear of what you say and the energy you put out, because we speak without using our words.  Maya Angelou once said, “I have learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” That is the truth!

Be courteous, concerned and considerate.
In business and life people need to feel that you care.  When you show them that you genuinely care about them, you will get to sell your product with less effort.  An example about this is to be focused on what they are saying and be present.  Another suggestion it to treat others with courtesy and respect.  When you treat others with courtesy and respect they will value you more.  If individuals understand that you honestly are concerned with their self being, they will trust you more.  Remember it has to genuine, so that people believe you!

To close I want you remind you to treat everyone you encounter with honor and respect.  Let’s make people feel important because they are!  Know the power of intention and understand what your real purpose is.  Which I hope is to make others feel great because you are GREAT!  See you next Monday and remember, to Believe. Change. Become!

Nancy J

Monday, June 20, 2016

How Your Negative Mind Can Keep You Confined And What to Do About It!



"Imagine with all your mind.
Believe with all your heart.
Achieve with all your might."

-photoswithquotes.com

I am super excited!  Next week, I have a very powerful “Make Your Dreams Come True,” workshop.  I love doing this workshop, but I have been having nightmares these last couple of days.  I dreamed that I am being called to come to the stage, but I am not ready!  I am missing my shoes, and as I start looking for them, I can’t seem to find a matching pair.  Finally, I find two shoes, that are not a pair but are the same color, they are bright yellow, one is a sandal and the other is a high heel!  I decide that the audience won’t notice, because they are the same color!  I wake up in a panic and try to analyze my dream!  I have concluded that the bright yellow color of the shoes promises my presentation to be bright and fun.  And the not being ready part are the negative thoughts in my head that is taking away from any positive energy that may be seeking me!  To remind you and myself about the power of positive and negative thoughts, let’s talk about the topic of, “attracting what you desire or believe should be yours.”  I want to help you understand that you, “don’t attract what you want, you attract what you believe!”  Here are five tips to getting what you want!

Know What You Desire
Step one, to attracting what you desire is to be ridiculous with your desires or dreams!  What I mean is to not limit yourself.  Dream big and make it bigger.  Do you desire a new job?  How about a job where you get to showcase what you are passionate about?  Don’t just settle for a, “new job,” go crazy big, and be specific.  Sometimes this task can be a difficult one because when we are young we are told to, “Stop dreaming,” “to get down from that cloud!”  Today I want to tell you it’s ok to dream, and even better if your dream seems out of reach!

Feel It
It is important to set a time a day to day dream.  Give yourself a few minutes a day!  Feel what it feels like to have a job or career that you are passionate about?  Are you looking forward to Monday’s like you look forward to Friday’s.  Are you waking yourself without an alarm clock?  Feel what it is like to live in a home that will rise to great you.  Feel what it’s like to be in a loving relationship with your family.  It is when we get in the, “feel stage,” that we activate positive energy for our desires.

Believe It Is Yours
I read somewhere that the universe is like a super store.  That everything you desire is waiting for you to go and get it.  The price you have to pay is the price of, “believing.”  Believe that if you desire something you were destined to have it.  Your desires were given to you for a reason.  Don’t be modest with your desires and, “believe,” you are worth it! 

Take Action and Be Grateful
One of the hardest things about teaching the power of believing, is that many people think that if they, “believe,” with all their might things will just appear.  And, yes somethings can appear effortlessly.  Yet, for the most part action has to be part of making dreams come true.  The way I describe this to my clients is by telling them that the universe is energy, and so are we.  When we put action or energy into our dreams, it matches the energy of the universe and it becomes more powerful. To believe is a step required to get what you desire, yet action gives fuel to goals and dreams.  Also, by practicing gratitude your energy frequency is more positive and you will attract more positive things to your life! 

Be Happy and Be Patient
Patience and happiness may seem like a contradictory, but you can make them work in harmony.  I have said before that patience is knowing without a doubt that what you are desiring will be yours.  Be patient enjoy where you are at this moment, be happy!  Believe that everything will come to you in the right moment.  If you do this anything and everything is possible!

In conclusion to attract what you desire, change your energy.  Believe that everything you desire will be yours take action, practice patience and always be grateful for what you have already!  Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!

Monday, June 13, 2016

To Compare Yourself To Others Is To Take Away From Your Light



"Try not to get lost in comparing yourself to others. 
Discover your gifts and let them shine!"
-Jennie Finch


In my profession of personal development, it is common to pair up with other coaches to present workshops and seminars.  A few weeks ago I got the opportunity to do just that.  This was the first time that I would share the stage with someone else.  I was a bit nervous because I felt that I was going to be compared to my very amazing partner. He is a very dynamic, energetic and a passionate presenter.  He is a very hands-on, and spontaneous. Half of the time you are wondering where he is taking you.  I, on the other hand, have a teaching background, my structure is very step by step, I have objectives, worksheets, “think pair shares,” etc.  As, I reflected on this experience it finally dawns on me that I was comparing myself to my partner and it was taking away from my light.  This made me uncomfortable because the truth is there is only one me!  I was worried that I would be seen as less dynamic or less energetic, but now I realized that what I got to offer was my uniqueness.  You know what I been told my uniqueness is?  My passion about my topic.  I have been told that when I speak about accomplishing dreams and living in passion, I come ALIVE! Yes, my partner was amazing, but I felt I met my objective and did a fabulous job!

Today I want to remind you about your awesomeness your uniqueness!  I want to tell you that there is only one you and you never have to compete with anybody.  Many of us feel that we are never good enough that someone else is better, and that is wrong!  You know why it’s wrong?   It’s wrong because there is nobody in this world with your life experiences, talents or abilities.  Here are five reasons you should never compare yourself to others.

You are too amazing and unique to be compared.
You are one in a billion!  There is no one like you!  Your life experiences, talents and abilities only you have.  When you measure yourself to someone else you are comparing apples to oranges.  There is value in what you have to offer to your family, community or business.  Seek to learn from role models but only desire to be a greater version of you!

You lose some of your light when you compare yourself to others.
You never have anything to gain when you contrast yourself to others.  On the contrary it takes from your light.  As you compare yourself to others you lose sight of your awesome abilities.  You lose sight of your greatness.  Stay focused only on you!

Comparison leads to resentment.
When you compare yourself or your life to others you become bitter toward yourself and others.  To live in resentment with others takes away from focusing on the wonderful things in your life.  Look around you, and see how amazing you are!  Focus on the wonderful things in your life!

When you compare yourself to others it takes away from your joy!
Some people sabotage their joy by comparing their life to others. Understand that you are capable of acquiring all your desires, but it will happen in due time. Don’t take away from your present joy, and be patient.

Comparisons are unfair.
Remember, your abilities and talents are dependent of your dedication, determination and talents.  When you size up yourself to others you may desire something that they have worked on for many years.  They too, were beginners at one time.  Don’t ever compare your beginning to someone else’s ending that is unfair!

If you must compare yourself to someone, compare yourself to whom you used to be.  Strive to grow and become a better human being every day.  Be kind to yourself, practice gratitude and appreciate your uniqueness more!  Until next time, Believe. Change. Become!

NancyJ

Monday, June 6, 2016

How to Stay in The Moment to Enjoy Your Journey


"Life gives you plenty of time to do whatever you want to do,
 if you stay in the present moment."

Deepak Chopra

Last week I was asked to read some lines for a commercial.  It was great fun!  I ran into a friend who is very passionate about acting.  He is a phenomenal actor! As we tried to catch up on things, I felt his energy a bit low.  Understandably so, acting is one of the hardest professions that one can pursue.  There is a great deal of rejection.  There is a lot a wait time.  Yet, it can be one of the most rewarding professions, if it’s your true passion! I know he will be successful, because he has drive, professionalism, dedication but most of all he is one of the humblest people you will ever know.  I have seen his work and I can tell he was born for the big screen!  As I drove home, I could not stop thinking about him and his low energy.  I wish we could have had more time to chat so that I could assure him, that the doubts and fears are part of our journey when we pursue our passion.  I wanted to remind him that pursuing one’s dreams requires a great deal of courage and perseverance and that he has those qualities.  I wanted to also tell him that it is really not about reaching the peak of the mountain but it’s about being present and enjoying the journey!

Today I want to talk about staying present.  I also want to assure you that even when you feel that you are never going to reach the peak of the mountain, it’s never about the peak, but always about the journey! Let me also remind you that perseverance and courage will be required to accomplish your dreams.  Here are some tips on what to do until you reach that peak, or how to stay present in your journey so it can be more enjoyable!

Do one thing at a time.
Can you relate to moving from project to project and never savoring the moment? I am guilty of not finishing with a workshop or presentation and already focusing on the next one.  I have decided to focus on each and every project as if they were my babies.  I have to give all the love and dedication to each one of them and not want to be anywhere else.  I have learned to breath, relax and release all the worries and fears that may show up.  You need to realize that when you relax and breath you open the door for more positive and prosperous things to come into your life.  So take a deep breath, relax and focus on one task at a time, on one moment at a time.

Go with the flow.
Stop worrying and go with the flow!  Sometimes you have plans on what should have happened, but the reality is things don’t always happen the way you planned them.  Go with the flow and make the best of every situation. When you go with the flow you are not giving up on your goals or dreams, you are simply trusting that God may have a bigger and better plan for you.  In my experience this has always been the case!

Remind yourself to stay present and calm down.
One of my biggest challenges has always been to stop multitasking.  Multitasking does not help with being present.  Focus on what you are doing in the moment by telling yourself what you are doing.  For example, when you brush your teeth tell yourself, “I am brushing my teeth.” It sounds silly but that will get you back in the moment.  Another suggestion is to do things more slowly.  For this you have to know how to manage your time.  So may you need to get up a little early to fully take time with this.  Being present and savoring every moment is a true gift.

Pick a time to project into the future.
Looking to the past and wanting to change it is damaging to your self-esteem.  Always projecting to your future and wanting to get there is damaging to your soul.  This does not mean we don’t think about our goals and dreams.  What it means is that we don’t think about them all the time!  What I suggest is to dedicate sometime to daydreaming.  Dedicate 15-20 minutes a day to envisioning yourself as whom you want to become.  Feel it, smell it and it should be it! But remember to always come back and be grateful for all the amazing things in your life.

There are those times in in our journey when we feel as if we are never going to get to the peak of the mountain.  We fail to stay in the present moment and project ourselves at that peak, and get disappointed when we come down to reality.  The truth is that you will get to your destination if you have the dedication and perseverance.  But while you are on this path why not enjoy the present moment?  Look around you there are so many wonderful things to be grateful for!  Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!


NancyJ