Monday, October 16, 2017

Nine Reasons We Fail to Pursue Our Purpose


“Allow your passion to become your purpose,
 and it will one day become your profession.”
—Quoteistan.com
I have been asked to do a presentation at a local college in my hometown. I am very excited about this presentation because I feel that college students and people in general need to discover and pursue their purpose to live a fulfilled life. I believe that following your passion will connect you to your purpose. It should be your life’s mission to seek your why. As you discover your why—your reason for living—you will remember that you have a gift that you must share with the world. This journey of self-discovery or remembering is not easy, but it’s necessary so that you can live a life of passion and bliss. Here are nine reasons why many fail to pursue their purpose.

Reason one: We seek outside ourselves
We never fully silence the ego voice and listen to the inner spirit voice so that we can pursue what makes us come alive. We listen to our parents, friends, and to the outside world because we believe they know best. Stop seeking outside yourself for answers. Look within to discover your why, your reason for living. It is only those who trust in their soul’s voice who will fully understand how passion is linked to their purpose. It is these self-aware individuals who realize that they are no accident and who will impact and change the world beautifully. Are you one?

Reason Two: We are afraid to fail
On your journey to remembering why you are here, you will fail. It’s part of the journey. But it’s also part of the growth. Without failure, you will never fully understand your strength. Failure is also a guide; it points you in the right direction. If I had succeeded in everything that I have done, I would never have improved myself or my business. We need failure to develop patience and perseverance in ourselves.

Reason Three: We fight change
Change is uncomfortable. At times, it’s actually painful. We fear the unknown because we are creatures of habit. But without change we would not have seasons; we would not have growth. Change is a blessing in disguise if you embrace it and don’t fight it.

Reason Four: We get comfortable
I believe comfort can become uncomfortable after a while. It is part of our human nature to explore and to seek.  When you become comfortable you don’t challenge your true potential. You become stuck and stagnant and you don’t grow. Being comfortable can be a way we hide from our truest self. Our soul has a mission, which is to remind you about your purpose. Your purpose may be hiding within your comfort zone.

Reason Five: Life happens
Yes, life happens. You get married, have children, acquire a mortgage, pay bills, and then die. Wow! That sounded so morbid—the “pay bills and die” part. I know life happens, but that does not mean you need to stop believing in and pursuing your dreams. On the contrary, you need to be more adamant about pursuing your dreams. Remember, you are the role model for your children. Leave the legacy of self-exploration. Inspire them with your life. Show them the rewards of living a life of passion!

Reason Six: We wait for the “right” time
There is no right time. There is only now! Do something every day that will bring you closer to your life dreams and goals. For those that absolutely hate their jobs, I want to assure you that your purpose is waiting for you. You don’t have to quit your job right now, but have a plan to start doing something that will align you with your purpose.

Reason Seven: We don’t have enough time
“There is no time in the day to do what I love,” I have been told. Oh, yes there is! There are 24 hours in the day. Whether you believe it or not, if you are mindful of your day, you will have at least one hour to dedicate to whatever you are passionate about. When you dedicate time to what you love it becomes a habit. These habits will align you with your reason for being on this planet. You are worthy of giving yourself one hour a day to pursue that special something that is connected to your reason for existing.

Reason Eight: We tried and failed
We all have failed. But the biggest failure is to waste our life doing something we hate. You will fail many times when you pursue your purpose. That is okay because it’s part of the journey. Fail forward and never fall into complacency. Some of the most successful people in the world stumbled and failed their way into success.

Reason Nine: We don’t believe it to be possible
“To achieve, you first have to believe!” I heard that somewhere and it has never left me. To believe in your purpose is to give yourself permission to live a life of meaning. When you understand that your dreams and desires were given only to you, they start to become a reality. If you have doubts about your ability to become what you desire, you will never become who you were meant to be. Believe in your dreams and persevere!

Your life is a gift. Discover that gift by deciding to pursue your passion so that you may remember your purpose. Remember, beautiful, you already have everything you need to make all of your life dreams and goals a reality. Your first step is to understand how amazing you are; your second step is to believe that everything you desire is possible for you. We are waiting for your gift—for that special something you do best. Don’t keep us away from your gift. Share it with the world! Until next time, Believe. Change. Become!

Sending many blessings and love your way!


Nancy😊

Monday, October 9, 2017

How to Pursue Your Goals



“Be stubborn about your goals,
 but flexible about your methods.”
—Unknown
I did it! I accomplished my dream of becoming an author. I believe having a supportive tribe of amazing women and my awesome editor, Debbie Miller , contributed to me realizing my dream. The journey of becoming an author was not easy. I experienced many stumbles and falls on the road, yet the journey has been an adventurous and rewarding one. I learned a great deal about flexibility, patience, and perseverance. Writing a book was very therapeutic for me. The book I wrote, Believe. Change. Become. is my story of believing, changing, and becoming. The writing process reminded me of who I am and who I want to become. Writing this book validated that everything I have been through thus far has prepared me for who I am today. This is just the beginning for me. I have many more books to write and many more ways to grow and become. With all that said, I must be kind and gentle with myself. I must savor this moment, stay present, and be in the flow of life. To enjoy milestones, you must remember that reaching the goal is not the most important thing; rather it is learning to experience peace and contentment as you reach for your goal. Here are some tips on surrendering, staying present on your journey, and loving your destination.

Set your goals, but be mindful in your approach to how you acquire them.
I have a problem with people that hustle their way to their dreams. It is important to work on your goals everyday, but it’s also important to remember to enjoy life. Many dreamers forget that life will not stop because you are pursuing your dreams. People die and children grow up, so you must remember to spend time with the people you love. Toward the end of writing my book, I was so adamant that I wanted to finish that I avoided time with friends and family.  Don’t get me wrong. You need to be mindful of your time, but don’t forget to live. Take time for the people and things you love. Make time for a coffee date with a friend. Spend time with your children. Call your parents. These are the little things that will become the big things when the people you love are no longer around.

Let go of perfection.
Stress can be caused by seeking perfection. Let’s get real. There is no such thing as perfection. Many people don’t pursue their dreams or goals because they believe that everything they do must be perfect. Perfection is an illusion. I have found that it’s better to get something started and put it out in the world than to never share because your project is not perfect. Perfection happens when you get your work out and improve it as time goes by. Please let go of perfection.

Things will fall apart, but you should trust the process.
Many things went wrong during the process of publishing my book. There were many days when I felt like giving up, but giving up is not part of my nature. When things fell apart, I had to trust the process. I had to learn the lesson and move on. As things fall apart with your dreams and goals, don’t despair. Keep on moving forward. It’s those unexpected detours that will provide better scenery for your journey.

Surrender it all and stumble into joy.
After you have dedicated your personal best to your dreams and goals, remember to surrender it all. I had to surrender expectations when dealing with my publishing company on more than one occasion. When I did that, I rediscovered joy. You will discover great peace when you surrender yourself to your God or the universe. I work hard on my desires, but there comes a time when I surrender to the universe. As I trust the universe to hold my desires, I receive more blessings than I had originally expected. Being reminded that you deserve much more than you originally thought is a perk of surrendering. Try it! Work for your desires, but then release them and see what happens.

Writing a book has been one of my biggest accomplishments. It was not easy, but I am glad I did it. Again, I am blessed that I had a wonderful tribe of women who supported me every step of the way. I am proud of my work, but I have learned to put less pressure on myself when I work on my goals and dreams. I have learned to trust the process, but most important, I have learned to trust and love myself more. Yes, believe in your dreams. Pursue your life goals. But remember to practice being present, being patient, and surrendering it all. Until next time, Believe. Change. Become.

Sending many blessings and love your way!
Nancy😊

PS. Here is a link to my book. Check it out! http://www.balboapress.com/Bookstore/BookDetail.aspx?BookId=SKU-001112832




Monday, October 2, 2017

Don’t Ask for Change. Be the Change.



“I always wondered why somebody 
didn’t do something about that.
Then I realized I am somebody.”  -Unknown

I immigrated to this country when I was two years old. I was one of the lucky ones who could get a visa because my grandfather was in the Bracero Program, which brought millions of Mexican workers to the United States between 1942 and 1964. Currently, there are nearly 800,000 young undocumented immigrants brought to the United States as children who are not as lucky as I was. Since 2012, these immigrants were protected by Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals (DACA). The purpose of DACA was to protect eligible immigrant youth who came to the United States when they were children from deportation. The current president has recently ended DACA. I could have been one of these young immigrants. I am sad for them. Today I want to dedicate this blog post to them.

Superman can’t save you. You can save you. I know the direction of our country and our world looks grim, but we need to stay hopeful and optimistic that the clouds will clear and the rainbow will appear. I know that uncertainty and instability can cause chaos within ourselves. We all want to be assured that we will be okay. We all need to feel that we are going to be taken care of. Only when you decide to be your own hero, can you save yourself and influence others. It’s going to be up to you to change whatever situation you are dealing with into a prosperous one. Don’t expect world leaders to fix your problems. Rise above your problems and, as you do, you will become the shining light who will guide others to do the same. Step out of your comfort zone. Be the change you want to see in your home, community, and world. More than ever, we need beacons of light who will shine light on the injustices of the world. More than ever, we need you to step up for the scapegoats of our nation. There are no accidents in life, just lessons. There are lessons to be found in what is going on in the world—lessons we may have forgotten—lessons that will remind us that our power is found in our human spirit. We have much to learn about our true purpose on this planet. Today, I want to challenge you to get uncomfortable; to fight for your joy and happiness; to fight for your dreams! Know that we can no longer blame others for the cause of our misery and expect others to bring us joy and certainty. It’s YOU, and only you, who has the power to transform your life and impact the life of others.  Are you willing to give up some comfort to create a better world for yourself and others? Here are three tips on how to be the change you want to see.

What is something you would like to change in your home, community, or the world?
A key to being a change agent is to identify what you want to change. What is something that drives you insane? What do you desire? Do you wish people were kinder to each other? Are you seeking more connection? Do you wish there was no more prejudice? I believe that we all have a purpose—a mission—in life. We are all impacting the world with our life views and ideas. What moves you? When we identify what we would like to change, we transcend into purpose. We all have a mission for our lives. There is significance in discovering what your mission is and pursuing it. My mission is to inspire you to believe in your dreams by defying all of your limiting beliefs. I also seek to remind you that although many people have surrendered to fear, love is the superpower given to us by our creator to change the world.

You can do something big or small.
To be the change you must emulate what you are seeking to change. For example, if you are seeking less prejudice in the world, ask yourself if you are being open and inviting to people who may be different than you. If you are seeking more kindness, be an example of kindness and love. As you change your old ways, you will influence others to do the same. It’s your light that will bring clarity to others. It’s easier to point fingers and blame others for problems. Instead, be the solution, be the change. Little things you do can have major ripple effects in your family, community, and the world.

Your success is dependent on taking care of yourself.
You can’t change the world if you don’t take care of yourself. Love yourself. Listen to your inner wisdom. Take care of your body, mind, and soul. When you are an advocate for yourself, you can better affect those around you. You give them the best of you, and they, in return, give you their best. As I become aware of my love for myself, I can give more to others. When you value and respect your being, it gives others permission to love and respect themselves.

Our world needs your help. Those who have decided to be the change they want to see in the world have indeed changed the world. Know that you are capable of influencing others with your good deeds. It can be your mission to seek change for the better. To be successful in changing the world you must take care of yourself and reflect what you want to see in the world.  Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become!
Sending many blessings and love your way,

Nancy😊

Monday, September 25, 2017

Is It Time to Give Up on Your Dreams?


"Self-doubt is the anchor that keeps our ships from sailing."
-Unknown


“I don’t know if I can continue doing this,” my coaching client told me, as we drank coffee and talked about her past business failure. She had joined a health food network marketing business that she thought had lots of potential, but she had not succeeded yet.  “I didn’t know there would be so much disappointment in pursuing my dreams. I have lost confidence that I could possibly be successful,” she shared.
“Failures are not the end of a dream; they are lessons you have to learn,” I responded. “Failures are kinks that you need to work out before you can grow. Think about your business failure. What is something that you learned from it? What could you do differently next time?”
“Well, I guess I could invite extra people to my presentations, so that I have a better result.”
“Yes, and remember that you are just starting. It will take some time to get momentum, but you will get there. For now, a small group is a perfect opportunity to practice your presentation with the few people that do show up,” I told her.
“I had not thought about it that way,” she said. “You are right. A small group is a perfect opportunity for me to get better at my presentations. Thank you!”
We have all felt disappointed at times when pursuing a new career venture, a dream, or a life goal. I personally know what it is like to fail my way to the top. I have been disappointed many times, but I have learned to pick myself up quickly. Here are four tips that will help you manage self-doubt resulting from a failure.

“Rome wasn’t built in a day.”
As entrepreneurs, we assume that success happens overnight. Why not? We are passionate about our service or product, so everybody else should be too, right? The reality is that success requires time. Give yourself time to grow. We make a mistake when we believe success happens overnight. Studies show that it could take three to five years, sometimes even longer, to achieve success in a new business. Although there is no exact timeline for success, I believe that you become successful when you make the choice to dedicate time to a life goal or dream.

Remember a time when you were successful.
I know it’s hard to stay positive when you have failed, but you must remember the times when you were successful. Know that you can win because you have won before. Write down your WINS. Ask family and friends to remind you of the times when you reached your goals. We are so critical of ourselves; we focus so much on our failures that we forget about our past triumphs.

Love yourself.
 “Love Yourself,” says the motivational speaker and author, Louise Hay. In the past, I did not understand that this phrase is the answer to many of our problems. When we love ourselves, we treat ourselves with dignity and respect. Think about someone that you love—perhaps your child, husband, or wife. Would you mentally abuse them? No. Then why would you abuse yourself? When you love yourself, you speak kind words to yourself. You believe in yourself and know that you are worthy and capable of acquiring your dreams. Be as kind to yourself as you are to others.

Fail, fail, and fail some more.
Remember that when you fail it’s a sign that you are trying. The detours that you encounter on the road to success will eventually put you on the right track. Failure is part of growth. Embrace it, learn from it, and move on. As I continue to fail, I am proud of my personal growth. Failure has taught me that there is no one way to get to my final destination. Dare to fail. Dare to learn. Dare to grow.

As I fail forward, I realize that in life we must experience disappointment so that we can not only learn from our failures, but also appreciate our successes more. It’s a win-win because it teaches us so much about ourselves and our strength. Expect disappointment on your journey to your becoming. Expect success as well. Love yourself, and know that you are worthy of treating yourself with dignity and respect. As you do, you set the mood for others to do the same, and you also gain the stamina to continue to move forward even when all hope seems gone. Keep your chin up, beautiful, and persevere! A day will come when you will look back at your stumbles and failures and be glad you never gave up. Until next time, Believe. Change. Become.
Sending many blessings and love your way!

Nancy😊

Monday, August 28, 2017

Change and Personal Growth


"We cannot become what we need to be 
by remaining what we are."
-Max DePree

Time and change have taken my baby and are transforming her into a young lady. My nine-year-old daughter, Miranda, will be turning ten years old in a few months. Last week I told her that we needed to start to focus on the theme of her birthday celebration. I like to take a few months to find decorations, invitations, and all the materials needed for a great party. Since we have a large family, every year we have a big birthday party with fifty-plus guests. It’s a very elaborate celebration. For the last nine years the themes for her birthday parties have been Disney Princesses. It’s a great time with family and friends and something that we all look forward to every year. But this year the tradition will end because my daughter asked if she could have a spa birthday party with her best friends instead. I tried to convince her to not change the tradition, but I quickly realized that I was fearing and fighting change. I wanted my little girl to still want Disney Princess theme parties, but she is growing up. She is seeking change, and change is inevitable. I was surprised at my resistance to her growing up. I, someone who advocates change and who understands that we must seek change if we want to grow, am truly having a tough time letting her grow up. I understood why fear appeared in my heart. Fear appears in our hearts because change and fear go hand in hand. We fear the unknown that comes with change. I told myself that it was normal to fear change, but I also reminded myself to embrace it and not fight it. Here are three tips on why or when you should seek change and not fight it.

Seek change when you are seeking self-improvement.
Are you doing something that is compromising your true potential? There is true greatness in you that needs to be uncovered so that you may fulfill your best self.  Are you seeking to move up in your career? Are you seeking a different career? Do you want to get healthier? Then you must pursue change. In these cases, change is essential for your personal growth. You are actively pursuing change because you understand it will result in a better you. This type of change will happen when you go after it.  Yes, making changes for your personal growth can be uncomfortable and requires a lot of work, but it’s necessary for you to discover your true self.

Seek change for a better life.
Are you happy—I mean happy, not just content—with your personal relationships with your children, partner, and family? If you said yes, skip this section. If not, then you must seek change. I believe that in personal relationships you should never be only content. In these areas, you should seek happiness. The trick to being happy with your relationships is to be the change. Remember a couple of weeks ago, I talked about being the change you want to see? Well, you must apply that same principle in your personal relationships. Don’t seek to change others; seek to change yourself.

When change finds you
Change is inevitable. You don’t need to seek change all the time because it will find you. Change that finds you can be an unexpected death, divorce, or job loss. It’s the way life reminds us that nothing is constant and that nothing is forever.  Again, I know it’s scary, but in the end you will see that change was necessary for a new beginning. In my case, my little girl is growing up. I knew she would grow up, but it caught me off guard. This unexpected change reminded me of my mortality. It reminded me that change is part of life, and that I must embrace it. I was also reminded that I must embrace who my daughter is becoming and continue to support her in her growth. She was my beautiful baby. Now she is becoming a beautiful young lady. Change can open doors to ever more wonderful things, if you decide to accept it graciously.

If you want to have a life of daring and adventure, embrace change. Don’t fear it. Change reminds us that we are mortal; nothing is constant in our lives. Also realize that change exists to push you to do new and wonderful things in your life. Change also shows you what you are made of. Change may push you to your limits, but it will also make you limitless.  Until next Monday, Believe, Change, Become!

Sending many blessings and love your way!

Nancy Salmeron😊


Monday, August 21, 2017

Why Should You Count Your Chickens Before They Hatch?


"Believe you can and you're halfway there."

-T. Roosevelt

Recently I read a sign that made me smile. It said, "Don't count your chickens before they hatch." It made me smile because I think that this idiom can make us skeptical. I believe this expression takes us away from positive thinking.  Can you plan for a future without faith? Can you follow dreams without hope?  Some would argue that it is wiser to be realistic even if it requires a pessimistic view.  I would argue that being realistic is a dream killer. Would we have Disneyland if Walt Disney had been realistic and had a “real job” and never pursued his dream of animation? Would we have an Oprah Winfrey if she had not believed that there was something better for her than being a news anchor? I call people who count their chickens before they hatch optimists. They have only positive expectations and prevail most of the time.  When they don't prevail, they readjust their sails, and try again! Those who don’t count their chickens before they hatch are pessimists. They buy into such views because they don’t want to get excited over something that may not happen. In their viewpoint, it's better not to, as Wikipedia puts it, "expect all of your hopes to be fulfilled."  This view is based on fear.  When we think this way, we can talk ourselves out of wonderful things.  We know that Steve Jobs and Albert Einstein would not have accomplished what they did, if they had not believed in their dreams first. They stuck with working on their inventions because they were people who “counted their chickens before they hatched."  Look around you. Every invention or creation that was ever fulfilled started with the visualization that it was possible. It started with the belief that it could and would happen. Here are three tips about how to live in optimism and count your chickens before they hatch.

Be clear on your desires.
What do you desire? Do you really want those chickens to hatch? Be clear on your life goals and dreams. If your desire is to be a chef, what type of food do you want to cook? Do you want to own a restaurant or work in a top-rated restaurant? Don’t be afraid to dream big and to ask for big things. If you are desiring to be the CEO of your company, it’s because it’s possible for you. Don’t limit yourself by playing small. When you play small you are taking away from your God-given potential. As I got clear on my desires, amazing people showed up to help make my dreams a reality. I know that this will be true for you also.

Visualize and believe that it’s possible.
Why not try visualization? You have nothing to lose and many wonderful things to gain. Visualization is the first step to your dreams. To visualize is to use your imagination through pictures or mental imagery to create visions of what we want in our lives.  Next you must believe in your dreams. To believe is to know without a doubt that what you desire will become.  When you play it, safe and don’t count your chickens before they hatch, you bring doubt to your dreams. I believe that this idiom cuts your wings. If you want to pursue something that you have never done before, you must believe that it’s possible. When you truly believe, you are halfway there!

Let go of negativity.
Negativity, be gone! As someone who counts my chickens before they have hatched, I had to let go of worst-case scenarios. I needed to stay positive and only expect positive results. When problems appeared, I learned to see them only as detours to my destination. Don’t complain about your failures; learn from them.
I used to be scared to count my chickens before they hatched.  I guess I believed that if I thought positively, I would jinx or bring bad luck to my desires. In my humble mind, positive things could not happen to me. I also believed it was better not to have high expectations, so that I would not be disappointed.  You know the strangest thing?  I couldn’t believe that great things could happen to me, but I expected bad things to happen all the time!  In other words, I assumed that I was not going to get any chickens, and was not able to stay optimistic that my eggs would become chicks. It’s funny how our brain works, or should I say, it’s funny how the brain works us?

I hope that I have influenced you to “count your chickens before they hatch.” You are EXTRAORDINARY, and for this reason you should only see the possibilities, not the limits, of your dreams.  Remember, dream big. Only have positive expectations.  Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become.
Sending many blessings and love your way!


Nancy😊

Monday, August 14, 2017

How to Deal with Tough Times




"Be strong because things will get better.
It may be stormy now,
but it never rains forever."
-Unknown

I am amazed at the resilience of our human spirit. A few days ago, I walked into my favorite coffee shop, and I met a stranger who became a friend. I normally don’t stay to drink my coffee, but something compelled me to stay this time. A woman with a gentle smile was seated at the table next to mine. She said hello, I introduced myself, and it felt like we were long lost friends.
To keep her anonymity, I will call her Stacy. Her husband had just passed away due to cancer. Since she was a stay-at-home mom and had no formal income coming in, she was in the process of losing her home. She planned to move with her two children into her brother’s home and live with his family of five. I asked her how she was handling this very difficult situation, and she said, “I take it a day at a time and count my blessings every day.” This made me think about the topic for today’s blog, which is how to deal with hopeless times.
If you are going through difficult times, this post is especially for you. Here are three things that will help you to carry on when you are feeling hopeless and defeated.

Embrace, or at least accept, change.
Accepting change is crucial in dealing with difficult times. It is my belief that one reason that we struggle with tragedies in our lives such as death, losing a job, separation, or divorce is because we can’t accept that our life will never be the same. We are creatures of habit. We like to know what to expect. When our life changes, we fight it and dwell on the past.  In my case, the death of my beloved cousin, Sam, impacted and changed my existence. Losing her to cancer when she was only fourteen was hard to comprehend or accept. I could not believe that she would no longer be part of my life. But I finally embraced it when I realized that although she would not be part of my future, she would always be in my memories. I have great stories to tell about Sam, yet I understand now that my acceptance of losing her helped me move on to a better place. Let go of the past, and accept what is. Remember life is constant change. Things always get better if you give life a chance!

Change your lens or perspective.
Zoom into a better lens. Some of the problems or tragedies in your life are a subset of other things that may be going on in your life. I know it’s difficult to change your perspective when there is a death of a loved one, but as with other problems you need to focus on the grand scheme of things. Fear of the unknown may pop up because of a change, yet understand that unless you face your fear you will not be able to change your view of your life challenge. In my case, with the death of Sam, I finally understood that cancer had made her body weak, and we had to let her go. It was no longer about us and how much we would miss her. It was about her pain. By changing the lens on why she needed to give up the fight, my perspective shifted into surrender and acceptance. Sometimes it’s okay to surrender the fight to shift your perspective.

Remember to count your blessings.
To count your blessings may sound like a clichΓ©, yet it’s always a best practice when dealing with difficult times. What helps me count my blessings is the understanding that it could have been worse. If you look around, there are blessings to count. In the case of Stacy, it could have been worse if she did not have her brother. She could have been homeless with her two children. Stacy told me that she was also grateful for the support of her friends. In Sam’s case, it could have been worse if she had suffered with chemo longer than she did. I miss her, but I am happy she is no longer in pain. Count your blessings if you are going through tough times, and don’t forget that in due time, this too shall pass. Remember nothing is forever, and you have the spirit of a lion!

In conclusion, your problems or your life’s difficulties come to you to teach you something about your spirit. They remind you of your strength. Whatever you are going through, or will go through, is given to you because you can handle it. Nothing is forever, even our pain, and worries will transform into happiness and joy. Have faith in yourself and find strength by accepting change, changing your lens, and counting your blessings! Until next Monday, Believe. Change. Become.
Sending many blessings and much love your way!

Nancy😊